. . . .pain. . . .

When my kids hurt, emotionally or physically, my heart hurts right along with them.  I don't think my kids comprehend this, but I'm sure those of you that are parents know exactly what I'm talking about!  I never understood the phrase, "this hurts me more than it does you," until I had children.  It's painful to reprimand your children; it's painful to see them make wrong choices and it's painful to see what they go through when making right choices.  A few days ago, while skyping with my son and daughter-in-law, my son asked if we'd like to see a video that was taken of him during a training exercise at the police academy.  I was hesitant, at first, but all six of us gathered around the computer to watch! It was. . .very painful for me, his mom, to watch.  Of course my kids thought it was cool, even my 13 year old daughter, but for me, I couldn't help but cry (even now my eyes are full of tears).  I know these exercises are needed to mold him into the police officer he needs to be, yet my heart ached for my son.  It seems as though, as my children have become adults, that the depth of pain I feel for them is greater when they are physically and emotionally hurt.  Maybe its because these "pains" will affect their lives on a deeper scale than a swat to the behind for not obeying as a young child.  I am reminded of how much God loves us and the pain He endured, sending His son to die for us.  I can't imagine giving my son over to a world that could care less; or Abraham laying Isaac on the alter out of obedience to God.  Could I do that? is my walk deep enough to follow God's instructions?  I pray, daily, my children will desire a walk with God; that they choose to step His way in all they say, do and become.